Finding Our Pandemic Emotional Circle

The mantra of our time is to self-isolate, and we’re doing our best to follow this wise medical advice. But we’ve learned we can’t do it alone. The only way to get through the pandemic is with our community. As we turn to our web of interconnection, we’re both giving and receiving care and support. When money is scarce and our known world disappears, we’re turning to one another.

The people who bring performances to the stage and depend on live audiences were hit hard by the pandemic. The theatres went dark and they lost their professional homes and their livelihood. So, they banded together to give of themselves to support one another. Under normal circumstances, my friend Charlotte Gowdy, would be found acting and directing in theatrical productions in Stratford or Charlottetown, or sharing her expertise with colleagues in face-to-face classes. When COVID-19 turned out the lights, she volunteered her talents to GhostLight a digital theatrical training ground. The project provides artists with opportunities for mentorship, conversation and collective creation, through studio classes, private coaching and workshops - all offered online.

Charlotte is teaching a class “in ridiculousness”, a four-week course called Clown Jam and, like most of the GhostLight’s courses, the workshop is fully subscribed and no longer taking applications. “We don’t have our incomes and we can’t pursue our vocation,” Charlotte says. “And this situation may last for a long time. Who is going to want to sit in the dark next to a stranger? But we have to keep theatre alive. So, we figured the best thing we can do at this point is offer training and mentorship.” Everyone is volunteering their time to the project and the classes are free to participants. “We’ve lost a lot but we still have our connections, our skills and our experience,” she says. “So, we’re giving what we have. What keeps us going is our belief that theatre cannot die.”

Evaluating the assets revealed by the pandemic, those that are proving to be the most valuable are the connections that Charlotte talked about. We’re identifying our companions-in-isolation, and we can see why we need them. These family members, friends and colleagues are the life raft of our lives and we’re using every conceivable technological tool to connect with them. Doing research for You Could Live a Long Time: Are You Ready?, I interviewed people who were between seventy-five and one hundred years old to find out what I should be doing to live well at their age. They advised me to cultivate the richest possible social network, one that includes friends as well as family, because I would need to draw upon these resources as I age. On a practical level, they said I would need my network for assistance with daily living. However, they emphasized that the emotional support would be even more important. I called building this network my RECP – my Retirement Emotional Circle Plan, and the seniors said I should be giving my RECP as much weight as my RRSP (Registered Retirement Savings Plan.)   (Read more in the Globe and Mail "This author has a different approach to retirement portfolios" by Larry MacDonald - December 25, 2015.)

It’s unlikely these seniors I spoke with a decade ago could have envisioned the pandemic and the significance it would give to their advice. They were unlikely to imagine Zoom cocktail parties drawing together far flung friends to imbibe and commiserate, or video clips from well-wishers compiled as compensation for a missed birthday party, or great-aunts recruited by stressed parents to entertain toddlers with online story-telling. Our webs of interconnection are helping us survive as we become both givers and recipients of care.

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The Pandemic Makes Us Look